TNT (Take No Taxis)

I had wanted to go to the Cameron Highlands. We planned to go there from Melaka, and spend Christmas in the area. Unfortunately, there was no bus between there and Melaka and we would have to go through KL. Also, because we plan our itinerary as we go, we had no hotel reservations in the Highlands and everything we found was booked up. Finally, Phyl was not excited about traveling the winding, steep mountain roads on a bus. We gave up and went to Kuala Lumpur instead first. On Christmas Eve I picked up a newspaper in the hotel lobby. The front page story................ a tour bus, filled with Thai tourists had crashed on the way to the Cameron Highlands. 28 people were dead and the article discussed highway safety, bus maintenance, and the laxed enforcement of driving rules.


P- You see. That road is unsafe.

G- Bus crashes occur everywhere. We didn't stop driving on I-10 after the Mother's Day bus crash.

P- I agree, but I wasn't riding in buses!

G- It's a very popular tourist destination, I doubt it's more dangerous than any other thing we'll do on this trip. It's the place I most wanted to visit in Malaysia.

P- I'll go if you really want to, but I just think it's too dangerous. Even before this bus crash I had read several articles and reviews about issues with land slides, washed out roads and unsafe road conditions going into the Cameron Highlands.

G- Oh no! You're not putting that shit on me. I'm not making you go if you're afraid.

P- I'm not afraid, just being cautious, but if you really, really want to go, I'm not going to be the one to stop you.

G- Screw me! If we go and something does happen, you'll be on your deathbed and it'll be my fault for making you go. Forget it!  It has to be a joint decision.

We argued about this for several days. Bottom line is that Phyl is scarey. Hello! We just quit our jobs and are traveling around the world. Isn't that scarey? For whatever reason, this particular bus ride scared the shit out of her and even though we argued about it, she was not letting go of that fear and I was not going to be the one to force her to go. We decided we would not go, although I was still pissed about it for a few days, and we decided to stay in KL until we flew to Chiang Mai, Thailand on 12/30/10.

Although we considered moving to a different, cheaper hotel, we couldn't find anything besides very scarey budget accommodations, that were that much cheaper. We decided just to stay at the Olympic and move to a cheaper room. So this morning we showered for the last time in the large, glassed enclosure, packed our stuff, and moved to the 4th floor into a room with double beds, a view of the parking lot, and a typical shower which was a drain in the floor next to the toilet. At least it did have a shower curtain.

We set off to visit museums. It was a hot day and we were sweating before we got to the top of the driveway. We walked along the river and past the front of the Masjid Jamek Mosque. Across from the Mosque was the Sessions & Magistrates Court (built 1910) beautifully built with arches and black domes. A little further was the High Court Building (1909) built in a Moorish style, with towers and cupolas. Across from the High Court was the Victorian Fountain, a flag pole (one of the tallest in the world) flying the Malaysian flag, and the Royal Selangor Club, a Tudor style building from the British era dating to 1884. Suffering in the heat, we decided to duck into the Textile Museum (Tekstil Negara) which was housed in a beautiful brick building in an Islamic style with alternating red bricks with white pilaster bands, and onion shaped domes. The museum was virtually empty and we enjoyed the cool and solitude as we viewed ancient textiles, wedding clothes, hair combs, jewelry, and bridal headdresses.

Leaving the textile museum, we walked ½ a block and stood at a taxi stand. After waiting for 15 minutes without a taxi even pretending like it was going to stop, we began to walk. We did consult the map and determined that there was no metro station nearby and no line that could get us to our destination, the National Museum. After an excruciating 40 minute walk, uphill, downhill, upstairs, downstairs (did we mention how much our feet hurt?) we arrived at the museum, and then had to walk around the museum. Ugh!!! But we did enjoy the museum.

After our museum tour, we each paid 20 cents to use the bathroom, used our own toilet paper in lieu of spraying ourselves with the hose, rinsed our hands with water since there is NEVER any soap, and used Purell to try to actually sanitize our hands. Just outside the bathroom we declined a man's offer to pay him to allow us to hold his giant python and take a photo, and walked to the parking lot to see if we could get a taxi.

P- There's a taxi. Damn! That couple is getting in.

The taxi drove to the edge of the driveway, stopped, and the couple got out and began walking.

G- Well, either they refused to negotiate the price, or they weren't going far enough to make it worthwhile for that asshole cab driver. No other taxi in sight, and frankly, I'd rather walk than give even 1 penny of my money to those assholes.

P- Whah!!! But my feet hurt so bad.

G- Let's sit here for a while. You want an ice cream? There's an ice cream cart.

P- What is he putting the scoops of ice cream into?

G- I can't tell...........let me go see. Um, gross!!! He is putting the scoops into bread that looks like a hot dog bun.

P- That is positively disgusting!!! Who eats ice cream on bread? The bread must get totally soggy as the ice cream melts. But really...it's like the Lucky Dogs in the French Quarter, but instead of weenies on your bun, you get a scoop of ice cream! WTF?

G- Blech! Well, the people are buying it up, so apparently they like soggy, ice cream bread. How about a cone? I did see a little bag of cones.

P- Just get me a cone.

We sat eating our ice cream, resting our feet, wishing we could get on one of the many tour buses in the parking lot, and whining about having to walk back. At least the sun was setting so it wasn't as hot. After too short of a rest, we began to walk. I was still eating my vanilla ice cream bar covered in chocolate. As I climbed to the top of the stairs and started walking over a freeway overpass, a piece of the chocolate fell off and onto my shirt.

G- Son of a bitch!!!! This was the first day I wore this shirt and it smelled so good when I put it on. Damn!! I only have 4 shirts, I cannot ruin 1 of them this early in the trip.

P- Look at where it landed, muffin. On your boobs. How did that happen?

G- I have no freakin idea because it's never happened before. I have things land on my shoes, my pants, my belt, my knee, but never my boobs. It's my lucky damn day!! Ugh!!!!!

P- It'll be ok, let me get my Tide stick out of my purse and you can wash it as soon as you get back to the hotel.

G- Whah!!!!!!

We continued to walk and, following the map as best we could, tried to find a shorter route. As we walked down a large street with traffic flying by, we noticed that a taxi was slowing down near us.

G- Is he going to stop and pick us up?

P- I doubt it. Did he just throw his cigarette at us?

As we looked, 12 inches in front of our feet, at what we thought was a cigarette, the damn thing exploded and scared the hell out of us.

G- That mofo threw a lit firecracker at us!!!!! I can't believe it.

P- Son of a bitch!!!!! (Phyllis kept her head and turned and wrote down his license plate as he sped off.)

G- Well if that's not adding insult to injury. We can't get the assholes to drive us anywhere even though they are TAXI DRIVERS, but he'll stop to throw a lit firecracker at us. Unbelievable!!!!!!

P- Why do you think he did that?

G- What else is there to think? Because we're white, women, or both. What else could it be? We're walking down the street, because we can't find a taxi, minding our own business, and he knows nothing about us except what he could glean from a quick visual assessment. I'd like to ram my foot through his nuts and give him a reason to throw firecrackers at me.

P- I am really beginning to dislike this city. So far I have found nothing fantastic about it. It is dirty and there is trash everywhere.

G- Most of the people have been very nice to us. It's only the taxi drivers that we've had a problem with. But I agree, I don't love it and it is filled with trash.

We continued walking and tried to calm ourselves. Unfortunately our path led us through an area that smelled like urine and was clearly a hangout for homeless people. We walked past a police station and debated, ever so briefly, filing a complaint, but decided against that and it may have only invited more trouble. We finally ended up on a street we recognized, stopped at a Circle K to get an ICEE, and went straight to our hotel. We just wanted to feel safe for the remainder of the day so we ate dinner at the hotel.

We went to sleep lamenting the fact that we still had several more days to spend in KL.